6weeks1day - Milestones

Yesterday was the 6 week milestone.

We lost of first pregnancy at 6 weeks exactly. It was rather dramatic and traumatizing at the time, though I now realize that, as far as miscarriages go, I got lucky. Everything happened naturally, I didn't hemorrhage, it was complete, and I got pregnant again right away. Regardless, it was a big loss for us....our first big trial as a couple, really. Every pregnancy since (there's been three), the 6 week mark has been a big deal for us. We hold our breathes on the 6 week mark and sigh with relief when it passes.

This time though, I held my breath but the sign of relief didn't come. And it won't. At least not for some time.

Carys died right around the 12 week mark, though we didn't find out until 13 weeks. She'd had a heart beat for several weeks and we'd heard it loud and clear, so finding the heart beat won't put us at ease either.

I'm scheduled for an ultrasound this week at 6.5 weeks. It's a bit ridiculous, really. I asked for the ultrasound for peace of mind...so that we can announce the pregnancy after being reasonably reassured that the pregnancy and baby are normal. I was aiming for a 10-11 week ultrasound....right before Mom and Dad arrive home from Doha. Around when I start to show again. But for some reason, they booked me in at 6.5 weeks. There may or may not even be a heartbeat at that point. If there's not, it's not going to be reassuring. If there is, it's not going to be reassuring.

So I'm thinking about calling the ultrasound department up on Tuesday and telling them I have gastro or something. (What ultrasound tech wants to be shoving a dildo cam cam up someone's vagina when they have uncontrollable diarrhea?) Hopefully I'll figure something out.

4weeks5days

My blood pressure is up.

It's never been a problem before, but it certainly looks to be now. I had an appointment last Friday (at 4 weeks on the nose) to get some bloodwork, etc.... and that's when the doctor picked up on the BP issue. Since then I've been monitoring it at home and it's continued to be 140s/90s consistently. I went back to the doctor on Monday (where it was actually normal - I told him it was probably because I had left the kids at home), had some blood work drawn (all apparently normal as well). My bHCG on Monday was 503. The doctor actually called me at home to say that it was lower than expected. Even though I know it's fine for 17 dpo I agreed to a repeat, which I had drawn today.

I head in again Friday for another appointment. At which point Dr. McDreamy will do my history and physical and get my prenatal forms started. Oh, and the pap smear. I've never had anyone but female doctors or old man doctors do my pap before. I feel like I need to spruce things up down there for the poor young (hot) resident. I should probably vajazzle or at least slap some glitter on or something.

Due

This past week marked a very sad milestone for our family. May 8th was my due date. I fully realize that if the pregnancy had continued on as normal, I'd still likely be pregnant, and not yet holding a baby in my arms. My babies tend to get quite comfy and only decide to join us after the 42 week mark. Nonetheless, it was my due date with my baby girl. I thought about taking the boys out and buying a pink balloon and filling it with helium and releasing it from Signal Hill. And then I thought about how long it would take that balloon to break down (thousands of years, probably) and that some fish or bird might swallow it and die and it didn't seem like such a nice idea after all. Instead I posted a picture of a pink balloon as my Facebook cover picture. I think a couple people may have gotten the point. My mom obviously didn't. I didn't feel like spelling it out for anyone.

In other (surprising) news, I have a new due date.

We found out this week that we're expecting again. Our due date is January 16th. I've taken eleventy billlion pregnancy tests thus far, and it's pretty conclusive. We're hopeful, but given our 50/50 success rate thus far, we're trying not to get too excited.

As always, we're hoping for a very healthy, uneventful pregnancy. This one though is starting off a bit differently. I had my first prenatal appointment yesterday with one of the residents at my doctor's office. My blood pressure was elevated quite a bit. Having never had blood pressure issues before (with the exception of a very temporary incident of "pregnancy induced hypertension" around 38 weeks with Jesse), this is quite disconcerting. Several of my reading were 140s/90s. They had me lie down for a bit and then rechecked and it was still up. I have to go back next week for another re-check. I worked last night and went to bed when I came home. When I got up my head was splitting and my BP was 150/98. I called the health line and they assured me it wasn't bad enough to go to the ER, but to check in with my doctor this week (which I obviously plan to do).

So, I'm kind of freaked out. I feel like this pregnancy is already getting off to a rough start. And I'm really concerned about what this might mean for my planned home birth.

For the time being, I guess it's just a waiting game.